final critique sum-up

i had my final review yesterday and was so pleased with the discussion. the major thing  after talking about my artwork with the group i think i discovered is that i think i am heading in a more conceptual direction then more classical painting. one that it is not fully about the final project but more about the processes. i am not even sure if i want to "paint" like on a canvas at the moment. i am more interested in exploring my ideas and concepts and the experience in expressing them. that being said i got some really great thoughts on new directions for my work in my crit.
one being that i take this concept of making a group of cardboard cuts outs, like my own army and really push it Making a lot of them and have an event or gathering with them.

 they are false friends which i choose how they want to be perceived and imaged. Have a event where they get destroyed or i dispose of them.  or even involve them in social networking like facebook and have these superficial or fake cardboard cut out disposable friends on facebook and give them substance. let them show an image. all these ideas are so exciting to me.

 i also really like the concept of using throw away materials, ones that dont last and dont have any value. there also is a quickness in the way i am working right now and flatness of my work that emulates the idea of relationships that are being put fourth. cardboard is flat and has no dimension like some of the relationships or even the Internet in a 3d mater. and on the cardboard as the top layers shrink the cardboard pulls giving it a life of its own.

 one critique told me i should take my classical painters hand out of the cut outs. I think that is an interesting idea and would like to explore it. make them even more not unique.

 i would also like to consider incorporate sound, performance, or a public event into the concepts i am exploring right now.

 I then got discussion on my latest work  "i am curious" and discussed the idea that i dont understand the words i am working over. and the idea of celebrities and the superficiality of knowing them based off of images that are projected into the public domain. and the idea to push the french words more by highlights the words i know and maybe covering or erasing the rest to create my own language forcing the viewer to into my own perspective. access to intimacy.

in all of my work i would like to next purse getting less gestural and more mechanical and see where that goes.

what i have learned from Pont Aven

- art is not just a career it is a lifestyle
-you can be creative in many ways, and sometimes do not have to just be doing the cookie cutter brush on canvas
-i dont think i can live without art
-i do want to go to graduate school
   i dont know for what but i want to take some time to realize what it is and explore other areas  and       mediums to try to
-i think i that i am starting to think more conceptually rather then classically in my art
-right now i enjoy exploring the ideas and getting them out through creating more then the final project that comes from the work
-sometimes having more time is better because it forces you to take time and think and digest ideas and feelings
-i need to surround myself with artist to help support and push me
- i need to surround myself with art to help keep my creative ideas flowing and see how other people are expressing themselves
-being an artist could be the most fulfilling experience because you are in a career where you are getting paid to explore your feelings and thoughts so deep and then express them into something for other people to enjoy. You get to investigate and grow and study yourself and thoughts.
-when you cook with butter it always is going to taste good :)

Kadams words of wisdom

1: kristin you are already on ur journey
2: kristin do it for yourself and no one else. just do what makes u happy, and if it doesnt dont do it
3: when things are coming to an end we should not be sad, but excited for the next thing we are doing
4: astrologic numbers... so cool.. mines 8 and 4
5: no one makes you have dinner before dessert

sad

thoughts about my work before my critique

i sat in my studio today looking at all my work hung ready for critique tomorrow. When looking around and reading over my artist statement i tried to think about what i was saying, how i was saying it and what i might want to do next

there is a vagueness about my work at the moment, that i really enjoy right now. to me its a flatness of images stripped of their authenticity and the lack of genuine intimacy in the interacting of each other in each piece. there is a unknown, falseness, unfinished, ungenuine feeling i think i get from my work at the moment. I do not think that the work i produced this semester is my best work, or even know if i am fully proud of it, but i feel i have made great strides and am proud of the journey i have taken here in digesting my thoughts and feelings and understanding them and producing them in my work. I think that if i can hold on to these concepts and keep working in a manner of producing work in this fashion i can succeed in making hopefully magical work in the future. i am excited for the future. i am interested in different areas such as sound, performance and sculpture, as well as pushing different mediums together in one.

in my midterm critiques i was told my work was soulless. At first i was taken back by this comment, but then i realized it is soulless. I question my time here with my art and its soul, but am proud of the thoughts that have been provoked by questioning it.

i cannot believe i leave in 5 days.. it is so weird i have so many emotions running through me. excited for my future. scared that i might loose all the growth i have gained as an artist when i get home because of distractions of life. sad i am probably never going to be with all these people at the same time again, these people who have become a true positive community to me that embrace me at my most natural (very anxious/ weird/loud/ and semi neurotic) state and also understand and relate to me as an artist and my work. i am really sad that i will probably never be with my closest friends here, all together again.

i have had so much time on my hands here and have been so sad or upset about being here, being let down by some people and some of the situations i have been in here, but now i just cant think of anything else but being sad that i am leaving. leaving this amazing special community that is basically genuine relationships and art.

I will never have as much time to just think and learn and react and engage in myself as a person and artist in myself and my work.

I can be nothing but excited when thinking of my future... it is completely unknown and very exciting. But i hope i can take everything i have thought, and discovered here as an artist, and person and be able to use it in my next step of my journey. I also want to take away from this experience all the things i have learned about interacting with others and how i want to be as a human being, and interact with people, and be treated by and treat people. How i want to exist and be perceived.

i want to live my life to the fullest. understand as much about as many things, people and situations and try to see things in all different ways and angles. i want to open my eyes and learn, and then use what i learned and explore. I want to enjoy and laugh deep from my belly. I want to be respected by others and open minded to all different ways of doing things. Want to show when i have interest and be able to express when people are interested in me. I want to be able to not react with emotions but take situations and react with realistic sense. i also hope to be able to not stoop down when challenged by people to their level but to be able to get past it and move on and grow. i want to not be affected by as many little things.. and also just enjoy the ride more and be happy to just be in the moment. I hope to be open and positive in my next step in my journey whatever it might be.

new project i am working on

This is a series of 8 drawings i did with ink on paper i collaged from a french a erotic novel named "Je Suis Curieuse".  The drawings are all of intimate moments between two people. please click on them to see the drawings better.